talking of Michaelangelo.
Saturday, July 26, 2014
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what it is not // 10:50 pm
It is not okay. Little bit little bit... it is NOT okay. You cannot just flutter like this. Don't catch it. Only catastrophe follows.
Thursday, July 24, 2014
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for I must write to live and to write is to live // 11:27 pm
It comes out of me like breathing. I have a voice and when I thought I lost it, it broke out of me and wanted to make sound.
Awoken is what I feel now where before, I felt vacant and empty. Thoughts bloomed, fluttering softly about. I don't know where or how to start, so, anywhere would be good.
The heart hears what it wants, it wants what it wants. It is fickle... the hat there, the green leaves and the camera, the red. It was interesting. (I have been using this word a lot.) The girl and the Spanish film. People from far away. Ambivalent and finding their place in the word. The amblyopia, the trickery, the annoyance, the judgments, the deceit. The Greed.
It's like one of those Chinese pencil boxes with the grammatically wrong English. Fake poetry. Perhaps it means nothing to anyone now, but it will help me. In years... I'll remember. The girl and The Pearl and the er-hu playing Jingle Bells in July. The heat and beauty the red hot sun setting on the river hidden behind constructions, ugly, sad ugly buildings. And that queasy feeling...
Chinese hospitality is served up with a puff of smoke. They are brusque, rude unless you are buying something (and even then they can be rude).
Here, where the tranquility of an empty tea house is broken by shouting tourists and vendors. Here, China.
How disappointing... those contrivances. Oh, the gawdiness of a country trying to catch up with the rest of the world but trying a bit too hard. The beauty so masked by their version of the contemporary, of their keeping abreast with the international scene.
There was a little bride in the garden. She wore red and white and a little tinkle in her hair. Someone was photographing. The water was there too.
Clean Bandit - Rather Be (the string prelude, then synthesizer?)
We're a thousand miles from comfort, we have traveled land and sea
But as long as you are with me, there's no place I'd rather be
Now the words have been drained, poured from me. There must be more, there will be more. I can be good like I was before.
My jaw hurts.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
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summer // 11:01 pm
...不過只貪圖一時的舒服自在, 而放棄自己的理想值不值得?
For the past year, I've really pushed myself but I haven't really looked back or thought carefully. So it's been a bit two steps forward one step back. I won't think of anything as a mistake nor regret anything. I can only move forward and be better.
A lot of people have been talking to me recently about give and take. I think I'm ready to give now where I've just been taking and taking. This coming year is going to be the beginning of an end, but also the start of something new, something radiant. I can only look forward with a glass half full instead of cowering at the obstacles.
Chin up.
(Try and enjoy your summer a little, won't you?)
Tuesday, July 08, 2014
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mouths // 8:19 pm
fleeting Muses -- sometimes i think of something to write but I forget to write it down...
The mouths that talk that say things that mean no harm but end up being dangerous, changed. Difficult to hear, easy to say. Watch out!
It stings a little sometimes...
